Sentimental Mommy

D's first lunch in the future dining room.

Yesterday we took our first family trip to our "stick house." However, D and I made our first visit on Tuesday. Our future neighbor made a post of my Facebook page asking me if I knew the lot had been surveyed. I didn't, and since D had just gone down for his nap, I knew we'd have to wait at least two more hours to go see it.

That meant I had two hours to be all sentimental about our houses. With my brain injury, I don't leave the house a lot by myself, so I have spent a LOT of house in this home.

I thought about...

• when we (okay, Niels) bought it and the eery first night I spent alone in it on an air mattress because we had an early utility appointment, 
• helpful friends coming over to paint the pink away
• the party we hosted in the backyard the night before our small wedding so friends and family around the world could meet, 
• Dutch Dad & Mom's gift of a sign that said "de Jong family, established July 29, 2007," which was posted on our front porch,
• discovering that we had seven TVs together as we merged our households, 
• how pretty our "fireplace room" looks with a Christmas tree and stockings on the mantle
• grieving the loss of our first two babies,
• a long hard pregnancy filled with nausea, complications and bedrest, 
• bringing our sweet, baby home on cold December night, where my mom had decorated our house making it all cozy and Christmasy, and then Daddy and D falling asleep by the crackling fire
• the foggy, sleep-deprived first months of D's life, watching him grow and marveling over the miracle of him.
• turning our front living room into D's play area and watching him roll over, then crawl, then cruise, then walk
• heard him coo, then babble, then speak, then chatter
• Daniel's first birthday with just the three of us and how D didn't like the frosting or having dirty hands
• the day our friends came over and helped us finally tackle the landscaping
• the way our neighbors  helped break a stereotype
• become more confident in the kitchen 
• a flurry of home repairs as we prepared to sell
• a sad long, too short goodbye to our sweet Bailey dog.
• nights of dreaming of the dream house

Since Niels has been playing with Home Designer, I've finally really been able to visualize what the new house will look like and can now mentally walk around the house. Most of my mind-time has been in the kitchen since that's where I'll spend a lot of my time and that's where we have the most decisions to make.

After D woke up and we headed over to the new house, I got all choked up thinking about all the things we would experience in our new house. God willing, this is the house where we'll live for the next 20-30 years. This is the house where:

• D will learn to ride a bike (currently, he is most excited about getting a new house because we promised him a bike/trike when we move in)
• D will make his own friends based on who he likes, not simply because of who his mommy or daddy likes
• D will leave for his first day of school
• D will discover what he likes and loves
• D will grow from a boy to a young man
• D will someday graduate from high school
• D will someday, in the far, far, unimaginable future, leave us to begin his own life.
• D will return with a special young girl he'd like us to meet
• D will bring his own babies for us to love and spoil.

Last night, Niels and I watched the finale of "The Voice" where Dia Frampton and Miranda Lambert sang the song "The House that Built Me."

Yeah, I was a mess.